*No Proofreading
Happy freaking Thursday I hope you are having the best day ever! My karma levels are out an all-time high right now. No need to thank you for my service but I dropped Future Mrs. Puckflaps and a platoon of other women off at an international airport at 7 o clock central standard time this morning. It is weird dropping women off to go on a bachelor party because I’m basically the last guy they will see until the strippers come to their Airbnb. Whatever I got some new vinyl records to play.
I am not good at remembering things that I should remember ex: how old I am, Future MRs. Puckflaps birthday, our anniversary, peoples names, and easy shit like that. So yesterday I went to a website called myagecalculator.com to see how old I am. I am 27 years, 4 months, and 13 days old at this exact moment. Every crazier is it tell you how many days you have been alive and I have been alive for 9,997 days. That’s insane I have almost spent 10,000 days on the round thing we call earth.
I am now depressed to know I am old but we are going to keep our heads up and keep plugging. Fuck me I just thought it was Friday again. Good news is that I have golf to watch today which apparently does not tee off until 11, which kind of sucks. Also there is hockey on and some baseball to watch. Speaking of baseball it turns out that the Cardinals, the Major League Team from St. Louis, Missouri, only have one good starting pitcher on their team, god bless Jack Flaherty. It also seems that our offense, like much of the last few years, fucking sucks once you get past the first maybe three batters. I hate watching idiots go up to the plate and do freaking nothing, go away Matt Carpenter.
So I am home alone today through Sunday and I don’t really know what to do with myself. I’ve always dreamed of living the Hunter S Thompson lifestyle but I am going to need a lot more booze, coke, cigs, weed, and a type writer. Basically he would wake up at three in the afternoon and go to sleep at 8 in the morning, what a guy.
I have been scrolling through Facebook dot com a lot recently and it is reaffirmed my idea that the majority of the population are not that bright and it is kind of crazy that the internet allows them a open forum to spread their dumb thoughts and ideas. I think I heard this somewhere but don’t quote me on it, but the IQ test was created to basically split the population in half and not really created to judge people’s intelligence. If it was a true IQ test the majority of the population would be considered at average or under average. I sounds like Alex Jones right now and I don’t know if any of that is right.
Alright I need to go chill out with the dog on the couch for a while and listen to my David Bowe record. Everyone have a great day and I hope all your dreams are coming true!
This Song is Neat:
Joey Puckflap Thoughts 