Full disclosure I am a little hungover, very sore, and have giant bags under my eyes today. You may ask why this is, and I would tell you because I was three sheets to the wind last night. I love that phrase I am going to look up where is comes from. In my extensive research it is apparently an old nautical phrase that means out of control. Here is something from dictionary dot com, “The sheet is the line that controls the sails on a ship. If the line is not secured, the sail flops in the wind, and the ship loses headway and control. If all three sails are loose, the ship is out of control.” Wow the more you know.
Well yesterday I cracked a Mango Truly around two o clock in the afternoon because work was making me work extra hard so I thought I would reward myself. After that around 5 o clock I went to shoot basketball at an undisclosed gym, and let me tell you, I still got it. Jumped wetter than you sister in a swimming in the ocean.
During shooting hoops and playing two games of 21 I downed two more beers. After I worked up a nice lather I left the gym, swung by taco bell to pick up food for the ole bag, then went home. Once home I inserted two tacos and a burrito strait into my anal cavity and poured some whisky into my Dr. Pepper I had got at the aforementioned Taco Bell.
Then I gave the ole bag a tight hug, while trying not to shit my pants, and made a nice makers on the rocks and locked myself in my gaming cave to play some online hockey. The boys played pretty well last night and we are buzzing at the right time because EASHL Playoffs start tonight. We will be Twitch streaming the games but not including the player chat because the team would like to keep their jobs. Please watch and support we are trying hang that Championship banner in the rafters.
But yeah, a few more Makers on the rocks, half a weed gummy, and a TV show on the Third Reich knocked me out like Mike Tyson. To be honest with you, I don’t remember any dreams I have had in like the last five years. It that bad? Do you still have dreams when you get older? Would a doctor please answer this question for me?
Last thing, I watch the season finale of Dave (the TV show, not Denver Dave) and it was wildly funny. That show is awesome and you should watch it. That is all I have to say about that.
Alright everyone have a nice day! I love yall and support the Salty Come Dumpsters tonight.
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