Well its Friday afternoon and like most afternoons during the week I have no work to do. It has been a slow day since it is the end of our “financial period” so there are no assets that I am able to fix.
Oh, I heard something on a podcast that really made me think. Why when women have vibrators or something like that everyone is like oh that cool ass chick or that is sexy, but if a guy has a fleshlight he automatically is the grossest person in the world? That seems strange. I personally don’t have a fleshlight, but the shame that it gets is probably the reason I dont have one.
This goes along with one of my other things in which one side is socially accepted and the other side is vilified, and this is drinking in the morning. I love drinking, and if I can do that as close to waking up as I can I will be happy. But if you go to brunch and you drink four mimosas that is all fine and dandy but if I have two whiskey cokes before twelve o clock, I’m considered an out of control alcoholic. I am anti-drink shaming and anti- sex toy shaming amongst all races, genders, and religions.
Also, elevator etiquette should be taught in all office building because people are incredibly dumb. Its simple. Let the people come out of the elevator before you get on it. Let the women in first. Whomever goes in first, ask the people that following you “what floor” and press corresponding number for them. Don’t talk on your phone. Don’t fart, burp, or sneeze. Final rule, don’t try and talk to me about the weather. It’s that simple dummies.
Isn’t it crazy how as a child we looked up to adults thinking they are all knowing beings that have the answers to every question and have their lives together? But when you grow up you find out that the majority of people are dumb as hell and that no one knows what the hell they are doing? That’s all for that.
Great news my boss just left for the day so its freaking party time.
I have also spent a lot of time on google maps the past few days attempting to plan a trip somewhere. I would like to go to an island. Islands are cool and there is usually one way on and one way off, so you know the implication (only It’s always Sunny Fans will get that).
So, I have been searching the seven seas for islands I would like to travel too. One of the fist places I looked at was the Isle of Man. This island is squished between the butt cheeks of the United Kingdom and Ireland. I would like to explore the capital city of Douglas and see the rural countryside. While there I would also like to play Castletown Golf Links.
Another island I looked at was the island of Fiji. This is one of the first ones I thought of because of my affinity of the movie the Truman Show. Another island was Tahiti, which is part of French Polynesia. I really like this place, but I am worried that is under French rule and that all the people would smell bad.
For some reason I also want to go to Nepal or Tibet, which are not islands, because looks awesome and beautiful. I’m not sure what the chances are getting to Tibet since they are under the rule of the Chinese government and I’m not sure that would like Americans bouncing around there, especially a nobody blogger. Did you know that Mt. Everest is in Nepal? Neat!
I can go on for years about the different places I would like to travel to and drink their local alcohol, but I will spare you for today.
Also, I got a blessing from heaven a few minutes ago. My ole ladies’ aunt and uncle are in town and wanted to come by and see our house tomorrow during the day. I just received a text message that they want to come today after the old bag gets off from work. The good news is she usually gets off work about two hours before I get home. So, I will not have to be there!!! I won’t have to see aunt, uncle, mom, and grandma. Talk about dodging a bullet. So, pumped.
Also shout out to the @tntittyfairy twitter account for sending out nudes. You are doing great work and keep it up. Check out the profile.
Sunday could end up being one of the greatest days in recent history. I have a hockey game at 11 and then at 12:15. After that I’m going to wash my sweaty balls and rush to the nearest bar to watch the titans continue their march towards the super bowl and get hammered. I am so pumped for this game I don’t even know how to feel since I have never been in this position. #Titanup
Alright it is two o clock now. Time to pound coffee and go to the bathroom. This is all for now. This is going to be a wonderful weekend, and everyone have a safe one.
This Song is neat:
Joey Puckflap Thoughts 