Dear Marcus

*Grammar is hard

Dear Marcus,

I’ll never forget the day our relationship started.  It was April 30, 2015 in Chicago, Illinois where our paths first crossed.  From that day to yesterday, 10/13/2019, I loved you and defended you against all slander in person and on the internet.  On draft day 2015 I wanted to draft you over the rapist, thief, and all around dog shit human Jameis Winston.  (Didn’t the Tallahassee Police Department cover up the Winston sexual assault case?) 

Marcus you were my golden god and a five star man, I even bought a candle with your face on Our Lady of Guadalupe.  You won the Heisman Trophy in 2014 while throwing for 10,796 yards and 105 touchdown with only 14 interceptions in three years running the Oregon offense.  You were one of the best college quarterbacks we had ever seen and the future was brighter that Alpha Canis Majoris (the brightest star in the sky). 

Your first game happened against the Harvey Weinstein if the NFL’s, Jameis Winston.  You threw 4 touchdowns and the NFL’s Bill Cosby threw 2 interceptions and a pick six.  At this moment titan’s fans rejoiced and knew you were destine to lead us for years to come and to hopefully a championship somewhere down the line. 

Flash forward 4 years to the present.  Our offense has gotten even worst than the pervious years if that is even possible.  We have scored 7 points in the last 8 quarters of football.  And you cannot even complete a goddamn screen pass.  It is absolutely unbelieve what you have become. 

Right now you are a border line back up that will most likely end up losing your job to fucking Ryan Tannehill.  Looking at the stats objectively Tannehill has been a better quarterback over the past five years. 

How sad it that.  It makes me want to cry.  Our defense has been good but the inability for the front office to put together a good offensive line, wide receivers, and a good offensive coordinator is insane.  And now we finally have some studs at receiver but Marcus is a broken man, body and mind, and can’t even get them the ball.  This seems to be the easiest time to score in NFL history (did not research) and we put up zero against the fucking broncos.

It is just sad to see what such a promising prospect has become.  The injuries had destroyed his body.  I mean he broke his leg, injured his ulnar nerve and couldn’t feel is arm, hurt his neck, cracked a vertebra, tore his plantar fascia, strained oblique, broke rib, and hurt his AC shoulder joint.  My guess he retires after this year.  He is a broken man and self-proclaimed dad and all around douche bag, Taylor Lewan, cannot seem to protect him even though he is the highest paid lineman in the league.

This season sucks and if I continues to go the way it seems to be going Vrabel will be fired and we will be back to our teams when Ken Whisenhunt was our coach.  Fuck Vrabel and his stupid mustache.  You can’t wear that lip caterpillar and be a dumbass. 

I don’t even know what to do anymore.  Should the team just move away from Nashville?  Should Amy Adams sell the team?  I have watched this team every week for 15 years and the only joy I have had is beating the chiefs in the playoffs after we knocked Travis Kelce unconscious.  Other than that there have been cool upsets wins in the regular season but not of that shit matters when you have won one playoff game since January 11, 2003.

In closing Marcus, our relationship is over.  I am finally leaving this abusive relationship in which I gave you everything, even bought a jersey which had your name on the back of it from china.  When I look back on our relationship I will try to remember the good times but to tell you the truth there were not many of them. 

I will remember of the late game interceptions and inexcusable fumbles.  I will remember the classic Mariota drive in which we somehow get bailed out with defensive pass interferences on every third down and somehow get close enough to the end zone so Derrick Henry can slam it in preventing you from messing it up.

I will admit I love you and you will always hold a special place in my heart.  No matter how good or bad you played you were always a gentleman and an all-around good human being.  I will leave you with some lyrics from Dolly Parton, “I hope life treats you kind, And I hope you have all you’ve dreamed of, And I wish to you joy and happiness, But above all this, I wish you love.” Peace Marcus. I will always love you.

Sincerely,

Joey

Here is a list of of players who have started at quarterback since Air McNair:

Young
Collins
R. Smith
Hasselbeck
Locker
Fitzpatrick
Mettenberger
Whutehurst
Mariota
Cassel
Gabbert

I’m going to my car to eat lunch and cry.